I’m writing this around Valentine’s Day, which means pretty much all the companies in the world are desperately trying to make themselves seem romantic.
Supermarkets: nothing says love like clogging their heart with processed crap!
Whisky distilleries: give them this to drink and your relationship won’t be on the rocks!
Undertakers: bury them with love this Valentine’s!
To be honest, and I wholeheartedly include myself in this, it is kind of scary how easily we as consumers can be told what to do. The world’s most romantic couple would still feel like a right pair of assholes if they missed the ‘official day to be nice to that special person’. So what if you support my hopes and dreams and shower me with undying love all year long? Where’s my heart-shaped biscuit you bitch?!
Happy Valloweensgivingmas
Valentine’s Day is just the latest in a near-relentless assault on our wallets as we jump from consumer event to consumer event. The Easter chocolates and hot cross buns, for instance, have been on supermarket shelves since Boxing Day.
When Easter is over we do get a bit of a break. At least, I think so, because I don’t count the barbecues and sun cream and water pistols as being quite the same kind of unseasonal temptation.
Weak-minded consumers (like myself) can easily be tempted to buy Mini Eggs on January 1st; we can’t so easily be coaxed into buying a disposal barbecue on a whim. It’s hard to cook sausages on a small foil tray under an umbrella with the back door open in the depths of February.
But towards the middle of the summer the Halloween stuff will start to appear. And then comes the most magical time of year; the bit just before October where hair bands with reindeer antlers and chocolate Santas jostle for space alongside plastic severed hands and witches’ hats.
And then it’s Christmas-Christmas-Christmas all the way until Boxing Day, when, oh yes why no I am fed up of mince pies so I’d absolutely love a Creme Egg…
I’m all bought out
To be honest, it gets exhausting. You find yourself gasping for breath, begging it to stop. ‘No more!’ you plead, as the capitalist bulldozer dumps another load of novelty crap on top of you. Many of these events will never not have a strong consumerist element to them, but the sanctity of the calendar has long since been abandoned. Corporate balance sheets don’t care about these days.
Once upon a time these events were also marketing events. The way it used to work was that it made sense to be topical. Easter is a big thing, why not have your confectionary business make some themed chocolate? But now the corporations have overtaken the event. The boundaries have become blurred. When does Easter start and end? The chocolate is in the shops for half the year. We’re constantly pressured into buying more and more until all meaning is lost.
Don’t get me wrong – chocolate eggs and getting a couple of days off work is my only interaction with Easter. But even I, a lover of chocolate eggs, can’t help but despair at the sight of them in the shops.
This is partly because I have the self-control of a greyhound in a Build-a-Bear store. And while many would say that’s my issue, it’s not like the companies getting me to buy stuff have much self-control either. If there’s profit to be had…
Suffering from a lack of self-control
You may be surprised to know after reading this far that I don’t think capitalism is evil. But what it is, is an idea that, like many ideas, is in danger of consuming the people it is meant to serve.
Companies exist to bring us things we need, and in return we give them shiny, shiny coins (or, today, slap them in the face with our contactless credit cards or phones). Sometimes companies cross to the dark side, where instead of trying to meet demand they try to create it artificially. What if we sell hot cross buns all year round?!
But, of course, all this stuff only happens for one reason: we keep on buying it. I’d be lying if I said I haven’t already had some of those Malteser chocolate bunnies and a pack of chocolate orange hot cross buns this year. And the second those giant festive tubes of Smarties are on the shelves I snap them up like an eagle in a tank of laboratory mice.
But I’m trying to cut down on all that. It’s only a large scale change in behaviour on the part of consumers that will ever force companies to change their behaviour.
Easter eggs in January – what’s the big deal?
Why does it matter? you may ask. If people want a Crème Egg in February, so what? But I think it does matter, not because a differently shaped chocolate makes much of a difference in the grand scheme of things, but because it’s a symbol of the fact that corporations control our actions. Culturally we celebrate Easter for a week or so. Commercially, for six months.
And I think culture should be the dominant force here, not commercialism. And I say that while fully embracing my hypocrisy as one of those people who thinks Christmas doesn’t really start until the Coke advert is on the TV…
I’m surely not the only one who feels a bit of festive fatigue by the time mid-December comes around. Companies are pushing aside all the other aspects of these special times of year until all that’s left is what’s on sale. And come on, let’s be honest: it’s not like if there aren’t hot cross buns on the shelves on December 23rd, we’ll not be buying any treats whatsoever until Easter…
